“I’ve Discovered My Husband Only Married Me for a UK Visa – What Do I Do?” | Muslim Agony Uncle Series

In our agony uncle series, we tackle the difficult questions facing Muslims today. This week, we address a heartbreaking situation that unfortunately affects more people than many realise.

Want some advice? Our CEO Shaz tackles some of your dilemmas in this video ⬇️

Dear Agony Uncle,

I’m a 28-year-old British Muslim woman, and I’m absolutely devastated. After two years of marriage, I’ve discovered that my husband only married me to get his UK visa sorted. I found messages on his phone where he was telling his mates back home that he’d “secured his papers” and could divorce me once he gets indefinite leave to remain. We met through family, and I genuinely thought this was a proper marriage built on love and Islamic values. I feel completely used and humiliated. What should I do? I’m too embarrassed to tell my family.

– Heartbroken in Birmingham

When Sacred Bonds Are Broken by Deception

What people don’t realise is that this situation is far more common than many people, it is a tale as old as time. First and foremost, please remember this is not your fault. You entered this marriage with genuine intentions, following Islamic principles and trusting in what you believed was a sincere commitment from your husband, a betrayal of your trust is not something you have control over.

Understanding Marriage Fraud in the Muslim Community

Marriage fraud – where someone marries solely to obtain immigration benefits – is a serious issue that affects communities across Britain. The Islamic concept of marriage is built on mutual respect, love, and the intention to build a life together. When someone exploits this sacred institution for personal gain, they’re not only betraying their spouse but also violating fundamental Islamic principles. There is no way as a Muslim to justify tricking someone into a marriage under false pretences.

What should you do in this situation?

1. Gather Evidence Carefully

If you’ve found proof of your husband’s true intentions, document it safely. Screenshots of messages, emails, or recorded conversations could be crucial if you decide to take legal action. Store these securely and consider making copies.

2. Seek Islamic Guidance

Consult with a trusted Imam or Islamic scholar about your situation. They can provide spiritual guidance on how Islamic law views marriages entered into under false pretences and what options are available to you from a religious perspective.

3. Consider Legal Advice

Marriage fraud is a criminal offence in the UK and many other countries. Speaking with a solicitor who specialises in immigration and family law can help you understand your rights and options. Many offer initial consultations at no cost.

4. Protect Your Financial Interests

If you have joint accounts, property, or other shared assets, consider how to protect yourself financially. Your husband may attempt to secure as much as possible before any divorce proceedings, especially if his intentions for the marriage were about personal gain.

The Emotional Impact: You’re Not Alone

Experiencing a betrayal like this can make you feel isolated and many people can often feel embarrassed, even though it is nothing to feel embarrassed about. It is important to remember that you are not alone and there are so many people who sadly, have dealt with similar situations. Try and remember that even though this marriage may not have worked out, Allah (SWT), has someone better in store for you and this is not the be all end all.

If you are really struggling, consider reaching out to:

• Muslim counselling services that understand both the cultural and religious aspects of your situation
• Support groups for people who’ve experienced marriage fraud
• Trusted friends or family members who can provide emotional support

Dealing with Family and Community Pressure

The fear of family disappointment and community gossip often keeps women silent about marriage fraud. However, remember that not everyone is entitled to your personal life. Although it can be helpful to open up to close people in your life about what you are going through, you are under no obligation to share this personal information with other people and you have every right to keep what happened to yourself until you are ready to share, if you ever want to.

Spiritual Healing

Many women find comfort in reconnecting with their faith during this difficult time. Regular prayer, reading Quran, and seeking Allah’s guidance can provide strength and clarity as you navigate this challenging period. Allah (SWT) does not ever give you a challenge that you cannot handle, although it may seem like meaningless pain now, there is something greater planned for you.

A Message of Hope

Whilst your current situation feels overwhelming, please remember that countless women have survived similar betrayals and gone on to find genuine happiness and love. Your worth is not diminished by someone else’s deception and being a divorcee does not make you less of a woman.

Take this one day at a time, seek the support you need, and trust that Allah has a plan for you that doesn’t involve being exploited or deceived.

Disclaimer: This advice is for guidance only and should not replace professional legal, medical, or therapeutic support. Always seek appropriate professional help for your specific situation.