Has Social Media Killed Romance?

A follow request. A liked Instagram story. A direct message. In today’s world, this is what passes for romance. For many young Muslims looking for love, social media has both connected us and disconnected us in ways we’re only just beginning to understand. 

Love feels fast, filtered and fleeting, like another trend.

But are we really okay with that? 

People get to know each other in person, not through perfect posts or carefully curated captions. It was about actual dates, long conversations, handwritten notes, and the kind of butterflies that came from a glance, not a notification.

Now, connection is instant. With social media, it’s never been easier to find someone, or to lose interest in someone just as quickly.

Everyone’s Connected, No One’s Connecting

You might be texting someone all day. But how many of those messages actually feel meaningful?

Endless conversations have replaced meaningful ones. Being available 24/7 doesn’t mean being emotionally present. Instead of growing together slowly, many couples fall into what feels like a “situationship”, talking for weeks or months, with no clarity and no direction.And we all know how that ends… With someone “ghosting” and someone else being “ghosted”.

Options Overload

Social media has made it harder to commit to someone because we’re constantly exposed to other options. There’s always a better option, right? Someone with clearer skin, nicer features, and more desirable. So we don’t settle, we stay available, just in case. But “we need to appreciate what we have before it’s gone”.

Private, now Public

Romance used to be private. Now it’s public.

Social media has made love performative. From posting date nights, proposals and weddings, couples are often expected to show their love. If they don’t? Followers, friends and aunties alike start asking questions.

But what’s lost in this desire to “share the love” is the intimacy of being in love. There’s a difference between loving someone and curating your love for others. And it’s easy to get that twisted.

Some couples are starting to resist this pressure. “I don’t post my husband,” one woman told me. “Not because I’m hiding him, but because I want to protect what we have.”

Hard Launch

Remember when you were told privately if one of your cousins or friends were in a relationship or if they were going to get married.

Now, you might be scrolling through Instagram and suddenly come across a post of them with someone you’ve never seen before. That’s a “hard launch.” No mention. Not chat. No “soft launch”.It can feel strange, like you missed out on something personal. “Hard launches” show how much love lives online now, not in real life.

Comparison Culture

Social media makes it way too easy to compare. You’ll be scrolling through your feed, and it will be filled with couples who are influencers and have those little blue ticks in their profile. They’ll be in matching thobes and abayas, giving each other grand gifts, or holding big bouquets. 

It all looks so perfect. It’s hard not to compare. It messes with your head. 

Suddenly you’re thinking, “why doesn’t my relationship look like that?” It creates unrealistic expectations and makes you second-guess what you have. Before you know it, your relationship starts to feel ordinary. Or worse, not good enough.

But here’s the thing: those posts don’t show the full picture. In real relationships, there are quiet days where your social battery has died, misunderstandings, disagreements, and compromises.

So, has social media killed romance? Maybe a bit. It’s easy to compare our real lives to those perfect posts, and that can even mess with how we feel about our own relationships. 

But really, it all comes down to how we choose to use it. If you’re looking for a real connection whether in person, on apps like Muzz, or if you’re already in a relationship, social media can be a source of hope and inspo. It’s not the problem; it’s all about the way we choose to use it.

Article written by Saarah Miah, MA Journalism Student and Freelance Journalist