Dear Muzz: Tired Of Being Rejected!

The two aunties answering your questions today have an acclaimed wealth of knowledge on dating and Muzz, as they have both been on the app. Found Love On Muzz has, you guessed it, actually found love on Muzz. While Kissed A Few Frogs has acquired a great amount of insight into red flags and relationship Dos and Don’ts from her own experiences of dealing with all the f***boys.

Disclaimer: Their responses are just their opinions, so follow it at your own risk!

Dear Muzz,

I’ve been on Muzz for a few weeks now and I keep getting rejected by girls on the app and I just don’t know what to do anymore. Everytime I swipe right for a girl, she swipes left. Once there was a match, but the girl said it was an accident and quickly unmatched.

I have photos on my profile and I have a very detailed bio. I’ve listed my job, background and exactly what I’m looking for in a girl. But still I get no matches.

I feel like if it was once or twice, then fine that’s normal, you can’t be everyone’s type. But it always happens. It’s really making me start to question myself and think, is there something wrong with me?

Thanks,

Rejected and Dejected

Kissed A Few Frogs Replies:

I’m going to be blunt here – your bio sounds too intense and long. While it’s great to know what you want in a life partner, I don’t think they should know about it until at least a few conversations in. Think about it. If you saw a girl who said they wanted a guy who was 6’4, an investment banker who already owns their own house, you’d probably swipe left right? Cause if you don’t tick aaaaall those boxes, then why would you bother.

But when you give people a chance you might be pleasantly surprised. Even if they weren’t the type of person you thought you’d be with. Also, a long bio might just scare some people off unfortunately. Or they got bored half way. Either way, short and sweet might help you get more matches!

Found Love On Muzz Replies:

That sounds very frustrating, but my advice to you is don’t give up, and certainly don’t lose confidence. Being rejected multiple times can cause your confidence to take a blow, we’ve all been there trust me. Not everyone is going to like you, just like you’re not going to like everyone. The main thing is to always believe in yourself!

If you start thinking negatively and having thoughts such as “no one wants me, there’s something wrong with me” then those thoughts will be reflected in your conversations, and maybe they’re already being reflected in your profile. If you can’t sell yourself to yourself, then how would you be able to sell yourself to a potential life partner?

I agree with what Kissed A Few Frogs said. Definitely go back and take a look at your profile, focus on highlighting key points about yourself, and presenting yourself in the best way possible. Even something as simple as changing your photos to better ones (e.g. no group photos, no sunglasses, no filters – let your photos reflect the real you!) can affect how many matches you get. Another point to make is that it’s great you know what you’re looking for in a spouse, but this doesn’t need to be mentioned in your bio as it may scare potential matches away, especially if you have negative comments such as “If you smoke, swipe left”.  This comes across as aggressive, and gives the impression that you’re not willing to give others a chance. Definitely keep those thoughts for your conversation later, AFTER you match.

Don’t take getting rejected to heart, unfortunately it is a part of the online dating world and it happens to us all. Just be patient and your perfect match will come Inshallah.